Whilst the Facebook photos of your friends' children may indicate otherwise, the transition back to school can involve lots of adjustments and challenges for both children and parents. Whilst change is a constant, we are all creatures of habit and adjusting to change can be quite stressful and also result in concerning behaviours, which if unaddressed, can become more problematic.
Parent Line 1300 1300 52
Some of the adjustment related behaviours and concerns that parents and carers have rung Parent Line for information, advice and support with, include the following:
- Distress about and/or refusal to attend school
- Sleep issues and concerns
- Increased anger and irritability
- Temper tantrums
- Homework and study issues
- Friendship and playground issues and concerns
- Behavioural concerns at school
Of course, problems are not usually confined to the children in the family and frequently the stress and anxiety involved in dealing with one unhappy family member impacts on everyone.
The following strategies have been compiled by the Parent Line Counselling team, to help families in adjusting to change and managing some of the challenges associated with difficult transition periods.
- Try to attend to the basics first, like sleep, nutrition, exercise and relaxation.
- Try to have realistic expectations about this period and to prepare for possible challenges associated with adjusting to change, new routines, expectations etc. This might mean cutting children a bit of slack initially as they come home from school exhausted and cranky, making sure they get time for refreshments and replenishment once home, before engaging in after-school activities etc.
- Check in regularly with your kids and keep the lines of communication open with them. Acknowledge and normalise that transitions are hard and that it takes time to get used to new routines etc. Share funny stories of your own struggles with change.
- Try to establish a school/work/home balance, with plenty of opportunities for ‘down time'. For example, not taking on too many commitments and after school activities at once. One activity per child is often quite sufficient, so both children and parents may therefore have to prioritise interests.
- Implement a homework routine, have a designated time and space for homework, as well as opportunities for children to seek parental assistance and support with homework.
- Develop clear expectations about family responsibilities/chores, reward systems (e.g. pocket money) and consequences for non-completion.
- Be gentle with yourself and monitor your own stress levels. Try to take regular ‘time out' even if it's a few minutes here and there for deep breathing, a cup of tea, walk etc
- Repair relationships when there are ruptures. We are only human and all parents will ‘lose it' on occasion under stress. It's good modelling for children when we can take responsibility and apologise for mistakes.
- Seek support and assistance with challenges. Stress can isolate us and cause us to withdraw when what we really need is to reach out.
Parent Line Counsellors are on call 24/7 to discuss any issues that relate to your family, there is also information on our website. 1300 1300 52.